[Steve should maybe consider stopping by people's cabins for, you know, any reason other than something being wrong, one of these days.
Not that anything's necessarily wrong, per se, but -] Oh - yeah. I mean... [He glances at Ford's current state.] It's not an emergency. I can come back. Or wait. If you're in the middle of something.
I mean, technically it's a spaceship on a spaceship, so it's moving, right?
[Sometimes Steve's sense of humor is weird. Sorry?
He does come in, looking a mix of determined and distinctly uncomfortable. But, he might as well get to the point.] I came to ask a favor. I need something - for someone. I was hoping you could help me get it.
[Ha ha! Technically it is! Unless the Barge is the fixed point and everything else is moving around them, or this is all a simulation and all movement is an illusion and--
--nope, no, that way lies madness. Ford sobers when Steve mentions needing a favor.]
He is literally only hesitating because this seems like such a big deal to Steve.
Even if they're for an inmate, Ford thinks arming inmates isn't wrong, especially when there's people like murder goddesses running around. People who aren't murder goddesses should be able to protect themselves!
He also gave a twelve-year-old a crossbow once. Ford's a little more thoughtful now, but he's also come to accept that what other people choose to do is not his fault.]
Of course. I trust you, Steve. If you say this person needs some knives, then they need some knives! ...I'm not sure I have combat knives, though. I've got pocket knives, kitchen knives, taxidermy knives, and two-dimensional knives that can cut through anything, but none of them are exactly made to fight with.
....but I can get them. Here -- you can borrow this until I get back.
[Ford crouches down and pulls a knife handle out of his boot. It looks like just a knife handle, but it's got a button on the grip. When pushed, the button will generate a very, very, very thin blade, surrounded by an energy field with a yellow glow.]
[Steve maybe almost looks like he's both relieved, and a little afraid to actually feel relieved, just because things tend to go so abysmally wrong.
But no, Ford seems like he's genuinely okay with doing Steve this favor, and eventually the line of his shoulders starts to relax, even as his expression goes both curious and impressed when Ford offers him what has got to be the fanciest knife he's ever seen.]
[It might take some work to get Bucky to agree to part with that one in lieu of "regular" combat knives later on, but that's a problem for future Steve.]
I mean - I hope he won't ever have to fight with them. But I think combat knives are gonna be the most familiar. [The most comforting, really, which is what he's going for.]
This is a big favor, I know. If you need anything, I owe you.. I owe you more than one, really.
[No kill like overkill! However, the blade only stays active while the button is depressed. Ford's taken some safety precautions here. It's impossible to drop by accident and cut through the ship's floor! Or slice off a few toes.
Ford's a little thrilled that Steve thinks his knife's design is impressive. He doesn't publicize that he has this -- it's pretty dangerous, especially in the hands of someone with enough know-how to disable the safety mechanisms that keep it from splitting atoms and molecular bonds. So, it's nice to have his work appreciated.
Always nice to be called generous, instead of heartless.]
[It is impressive. And generous. Especially because there aren't a whole lot of people that Steve thinks he could ask for weapons. Or - that he should.
Of course, he's also not surprised when Ford catches on, because,] Yeah. He just - I think it would make him feel safer. I don't believe he'd use anything unless he was attacked and frankly, if that happens, then I can't blame him.
But I'll take full responsibility if anything does happen.
[Ford's eyebrows draw up in concern. Oh no, Steve. Oh that sense of responsibility is familiar, and the it's my fault if something happens that I could have prevented has led Ford into some of his most destructive decisions.]
You don't have to do that, Steve. If he ends up in a situation where he feels he has to use it, it's not your fault. You won't have chosen to start that fight, or made the choice to use the knife.
Steve, even if Bucky decides to use the Particle Splitter to stab his way through half the population, that's still something he did, not you. You're not responsible for his decisions.
[Ford's not aware of the brainwashing, or how possible it is for Bucky to stab his way through half the population without meaning to. He's thinking more in terms of what he learned, which was, Ford Pines did not cause Weirdmageddon, Bill did.]
And, if he's really trying to figure himself out -- shouldn't he be allowed to make those choices as much as possible? Without someone else taking them on?
Besides, I hate the Barge as much as you do, but it's probably the safest possible place for him to make mistakes. It's designed to be.
[So, in Ford's opinion, trusting the Winter Soldier with a deadly weapon is the best thing Steve can do for him right now.]
[Well, all those things are technically true - and, as (hopefully) the only person on board who currently knows Bucky's trigger words, Steve definitely plans to do his level best to make sure everything Bucky does, good or bad, is his choice.
Even so,] I understand all that. I'm just saying, it's - It's like taking responsibility for someone under your command. Does that make sense?
[He doesn't want a bad decision coming down on Bucky or Ford, when Steve's the one who put it into motion. That's all he's trying to say, whether it's really any different or not.]
[As someone who's put bad things into motion before, bad things which wouldn't have happened if other people hadn't taken action to ensure they happened -- Ford disagrees.]
Not really. Unless in your world, getting someone a weapon makes you their commanding officer.
[Which could be the case. Ford doesn't know. Is Steve Bucky's commanding officer here? Does Bucky want him to be? Is everyone on the same page about this? Those are the questions sitting in Ford's mind.]
[It strikes Ford a little bit as Steve making a decision for Bucky without telling him, even though it's well-intended. Steve's chosen to preemptively take responsibility for anything Bucky does, without consulting the man himself about whether that's what he expects. This is not an entirely fair reading of the situation; Ford tends to project his own experiences onto other people, and he recently has had well-intended decisions made to protect him that he wasn't consulted about and weren't what he wanted.]
I know you're trying to help him, to protect him from what people here might do in retribution by taking it on yourself, but...I think you should find out if he wants you to take full responsibility for what he does with the knives you're getting him.
[Ford is concerned for Steve, and for Bucky. He knows it's not really his place to get involved, and that he doesn't know what will or won't help, but....Steve is Ford's friend, and Ford made himself miserable for years playing the solo blame game, and wasn't even right about it.]
I'm sorry. I know it's not my place to get involved, and you know the situation much better than I do. I just -- don't want you to blame yourself for something that's not your fault.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
momijizukamori
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-09 04:20 pm (UTC)Not that anything's necessarily wrong, per se, but -] Oh - yeah. I mean... [He glances at Ford's current state.] It's not an emergency. I can come back. Or wait. If you're in the middle of something.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-09 04:56 pm (UTC)[Ford steps aside, motioning for Steve to enter.]
Come in, come in.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-09 06:53 pm (UTC)[Sometimes Steve's sense of humor is weird. Sorry?
He does come in, looking a mix of determined and distinctly uncomfortable. But, he might as well get to the point.] I came to ask a favor. I need something - for someone. I was hoping you could help me get it.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 03:14 am (UTC)--nope, no, that way lies madness. Ford sobers when Steve mentions needing a favor.]
What is it, Steve?
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 04:09 am (UTC)They're not for me, but you should know that I wouldn't ask for them for anyone I thought was going to do something bad with them.
[It's... maybe obvious who they're for, but maybe not. Either way, he wants to be as upfront about it as he can.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 02:47 pm (UTC)He is literally only hesitating because this seems like such a big deal to Steve.
Even if they're for an inmate, Ford thinks arming inmates isn't wrong, especially when there's people like murder goddesses running around. People who aren't murder goddesses should be able to protect themselves!
He also gave a twelve-year-old a crossbow once. Ford's a little more thoughtful now, but he's also come to accept that what other people choose to do is not his fault.]
Of course. I trust you, Steve. If you say this person needs some knives, then they need some knives! ...I'm not sure I have combat knives, though. I've got pocket knives, kitchen knives, taxidermy knives, and two-dimensional knives that can cut through anything, but none of them are exactly made to fight with.
....but I can get them. Here -- you can borrow this until I get back.
[Ford crouches down and pulls a knife handle out of his boot. It looks like just a knife handle, but it's got a button on the grip. When pushed, the button will generate a very, very, very thin blade, surrounded by an energy field with a yellow glow.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 03:26 pm (UTC)But no, Ford seems like he's genuinely okay with doing Steve this favor, and eventually the line of his shoulders starts to relax, even as his expression goes both curious and impressed when Ford offers him what has got to be the fanciest knife he's ever seen.]
Oh - wow, that's... really generous, Ford. Thank you.
[It might take some work to get Bucky to agree to part with that one in lieu of "regular" combat knives later on, but that's a problem for future Steve.]
I mean - I hope he won't ever have to fight with them. But I think combat knives are gonna be the most familiar. [The most comforting, really, which is what he's going for.]
This is a big favor, I know. If you need anything, I owe you.. I owe you more than one, really.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 03:46 pm (UTC)Ford's a little thrilled that Steve thinks his knife's design is impressive. He doesn't publicize that he has this -- it's pretty dangerous, especially in the hands of someone with enough know-how to disable the safety mechanisms that keep it from splitting atoms and molecular bonds. So, it's nice to have his work appreciated.
Always nice to be called generous, instead of heartless.]
Ah, don't mention it. I'm happy to help!
...
Is this for Bucky?
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 03:57 pm (UTC)Of course, he's also not surprised when Ford catches on, because,] Yeah. He just - I think it would make him feel safer. I don't believe he'd use anything unless he was attacked and frankly, if that happens, then I can't blame him.
But I'll take full responsibility if anything does happen.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 04:05 pm (UTC)You don't have to do that, Steve. If he ends up in a situation where he feels he has to use it, it's not your fault. You won't have chosen to start that fight, or made the choice to use the knife.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 04:19 pm (UTC)So maybe he can't take responsibility for that.] But if he uses it out of something other than self-defense... that's different.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 04:39 pm (UTC)[Ford's not aware of the brainwashing, or how possible it is for Bucky to stab his way through half the population without meaning to. He's thinking more in terms of what he learned, which was, Ford Pines did not cause Weirdmageddon, Bill did.]
And, if he's really trying to figure himself out -- shouldn't he be allowed to make those choices as much as possible? Without someone else taking them on?
Besides, I hate the Barge as much as you do, but it's probably the safest possible place for him to make mistakes. It's designed to be.
[So, in Ford's opinion, trusting the Winter Soldier with a deadly weapon is the best thing Steve can do for him right now.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 06:23 pm (UTC)Even so,] I understand all that. I'm just saying, it's - It's like taking responsibility for someone under your command. Does that make sense?
[He doesn't want a bad decision coming down on Bucky or Ford, when Steve's the one who put it into motion. That's all he's trying to say, whether it's really any different or not.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 06:34 pm (UTC)Not really. Unless in your world, getting someone a weapon makes you their commanding officer.
[Which could be the case. Ford doesn't know. Is Steve Bucky's commanding officer here? Does Bucky want him to be? Is everyone on the same page about this? Those are the questions sitting in Ford's mind.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 06:40 pm (UTC)[You know. In the Army. On paper.
Nobody is on the same page about this, nope.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 06:45 pm (UTC)Is he aware of that?
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 08:20 pm (UTC)I guess if he remembers.
He might not.
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-10 08:42 pm (UTC)I know you're trying to help him, to protect him from what people here might do in retribution by taking it on yourself, but...I think you should find out if he wants you to take full responsibility for what he does with the knives you're getting him.
[Ford is concerned for Steve, and for Bucky. He knows it's not really his place to get involved, and that he doesn't know what will or won't help, but....Steve is Ford's friend, and Ford made himself miserable for years playing the solo blame game, and wasn't even right about it.]
I'm sorry. I know it's not my place to get involved, and you know the situation much better than I do. I just -- don't want you to blame yourself for something that's not your fault.
[Which he suspects Steve Rogers does, a lot.]
Re: spam
Date: 2020-08-16 10:43 pm (UTC)But to Steve, this is genuinely different. He frowns, because,] There's a difference between taking responsibility and blaming myself.
I mean - don't get me wrong. I can do both at once. But there's still a difference.
[Right?]