He takes a moment to think back. Rose deserves a better answer than I stopped fighting.
"Well, I--I don't think I really did anything." He takes a breath. "It didn't happen until a few months after Bill and I tried to reach the Authority. I was working on the watches at the time. I'd accepted that I needed to get people's consent if I was going to involve them in my studies, and I'd accepted that more, ah, active measures risked ship-wide catastrophe. That wasn't fair to the inmates who're stuck here. So, I started working on a project people could volunteer for, and, one day....I graduated."
"Graduation is a particularly frustrating metric," he says. "There's no way to measure it with any kind of precision, since it's so different for everyone. That's part of why I think the Authority really is more of a council than a single entity. But I wasn't even thinking about it. I was just...I was looking for ways to help people, ways that wouldn't risk them being hurt again. I suppose that was enough for whoever was in charge.
"I've made mistakes, since I graduated. It didn't magically make me able to predict what'd hurt people and what wouldn't! But I did get better at listening, and at not feeling like I had to be the one to solve the big problems, no matter the cost. Sometimes, it's okay to just...ask if someone wants to watch a movie! And hope that someone else will be able to do more with your data than you can."
He pauses. "Are you feeling like you should be doing something? Waking up ready to go?" he asks her.
"Yes! There's so much I want to do that I can't do here. I want to go home, I want to see my son and Greg and the Crystal Gems. I want to tell them I'm sorry about everything I did. But..."
She looks away, hiding her face.
"...I'm scared, Ford. I know they don't owe me forgiveness, and I'm ready to work for it, and...and I know they might never want me as a part of their lives again. But what if I can't deal with that, if it happens? What if I can't accept it?"
Oh, no. Ford's brows draw up, and he crosses to Rose, putting a hand on her shoulder. He doesn't try to look at her face, he's just here. Here for her.
He waits there a moment, taking a long breath. "I don't know," he tells her, honestly. "But if it were me, and Stan said he never wanted me in his life again, I'd..." Sneak a tracking device into his body against his express wishes. Nope. No. That's the other Ford. Not this one. What this Ford would do is different. "...I'd just take it one day at a time. Even if it feels impossible. They might not forgive you at first. They may even not want to imagine the possibility! But that doesn't mean you have to give up on it ever happening, or stop trying to be a force for good in the universe.
"And," he adds, "if you need me, or anyone else on the ship, there's ways to get in touch. If you want help, or just someone to talk to."
"And...and if they never forgive me," she says softly, "that's their decision. I just...keep trying to be good. And trying...trying not to put anyone in the place where I put them. Knowing it's okay to make mistakes, like you said, so long as I know that's what they are."
"Right," Ford says. "And for every mistake, there's going to be a time when you get it right. You're a really remarkable person, Rose, and I'm glad I have the chance to know you."
You know what you two broken teacups need? To hug it out. Hug train's coming in the station. Hugapalooza 2000. She gets a big, sincere hug, because she is a person who deserves love and a second chance and definitely hugs.
"But no more secrets, okay?" he tells her, playful rather than condemning. "Take it from me - it's much easier to make mistakes when you don't seek out good advice. Or listen to it when it's given to you."
Ford's thinking about all the times he didn't listen to advice and all the mistakes he could have avoided making if he'd told people what he was doing and being glad Rose's good intentions have the chance of manifesting as more good for the universe when a flash of color in the corner of his vision catches his eye.
He pulls back from the hug enough to look.
"That's funny. I'm sure those weren't there before."
Rose reaches out, picking up a cookie with what should be normal strength
in her inmate-limited state - and it shatters into crumbs between her
fingertips.
She gets to her feet, making some distance between herself and Ford, then
summons her sword - a huge, opalescent pink blade with a rose-patterned
hilt.
"Rose, that's incredible!" Ford exclaims. "I definitely didn't request that one back! You know what this means, don't you?"
He's beaming. As arbitrary, frustrating, and made-to-entertain as graduation is, the fact that Rose is alive and free again is something to be happy about.
But then she does. The celebratory snacks out of nowhere, the abilities she
couldn't access? It all adds up, and she whoops a laugh and picks him up
into a much bigger hug like he weighs nothing.
Ford brushes off his sweater, a twinge of doubt nagging at his mind.
He wants his deal -- wants to see if the Admiral will give him the ability he wants, to get his family out of Gravity Falls and into a temporally open dimension. But...
It doesn't sit quite right with him to take the deal and walk away, as though all of this had just been a transaction. Ford hadn't really thought he could get anyone to graduation. It wasn't why he'd stayed. He'd meant to be a friend to Rose, not a moral guide, and she was the one who had done the work. Maybe he could find a way to get what he needed anyway, with enough time and science.
He wouldn't be able to sit peacefully with himself, as someone concerned about inmates' wellbeing, if he didn't ask her.
"Actually, about that," Ford says, his face turning serious. "I wanted to ask you -- do you want to take the deal? It doesn't feel right for me to take it, not without seeing if there was anything you needed first. You're the one whose life was in danger, who had to grow and change. I was...all I did was be your friend."
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
spam!
Just a minute!
[Ford comes to the door with welding goggles pushed up onto his forehead and a smile on his face -- he's glad to see her.]
Hello, Rose. ...is everything all right?
Re: spam!
Fine, is the thing that wants to trip off her tongue, but instead she just looks away for a moment.
"I don't know. Can we talk?"
Re: spam!
"Of course we can," Ford says. "Come on in." He opens the door wider and steps aside to let her into the Mystery Shack.
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She finds a place to sit and lowers herself down, carefully adjusting her skirts around her.
"....Ford, how did you graduate? I mean, what happened? What did you do?"
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"Well, I--I don't think I really did anything." He takes a breath. "It didn't happen until a few months after Bill and I tried to reach the Authority. I was working on the watches at the time. I'd accepted that I needed to get people's consent if I was going to involve them in my studies, and I'd accepted that more, ah, active measures risked ship-wide catastrophe. That wasn't fair to the inmates who're stuck here. So, I started working on a project people could volunteer for, and, one day....I graduated."
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She folds her hands together on her lap, frowning thoughtfully.
"So there wasn't...you didn't do something to make it happen? You didn't...I don't know, you didn't wake up one morning and realize you were ready?"
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"Graduation is a particularly frustrating metric," he says. "There's no way to measure it with any kind of precision, since it's so different for everyone. That's part of why I think the Authority really is more of a council than a single entity. But I wasn't even thinking about it. I was just...I was looking for ways to help people, ways that wouldn't risk them being hurt again. I suppose that was enough for whoever was in charge.
"I've made mistakes, since I graduated. It didn't magically make me able to predict what'd hurt people and what wouldn't! But I did get better at listening, and at not feeling like I had to be the one to solve the big problems, no matter the cost. Sometimes, it's okay to just...ask if someone wants to watch a movie! And hope that someone else will be able to do more with your data than you can."
He pauses. "Are you feeling like you should be doing something? Waking up ready to go?" he asks her.
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She looks away, hiding her face.
"...I'm scared, Ford. I know they don't owe me forgiveness, and I'm ready to work for it, and...and I know they might never want me as a part of their lives again. But what if I can't deal with that, if it happens? What if I can't accept it?"
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He waits there a moment, taking a long breath. "I don't know," he tells her, honestly. "But if it were me, and Stan said he never wanted me in his life again, I'd..." Sneak a tracking device into his body against his express wishes. Nope. No. That's the other Ford. Not this one. What this Ford would do is different. "...I'd just take it one day at a time. Even if it feels impossible. They might not forgive you at first. They may even not want to imagine the possibility! But that doesn't mean you have to give up on it ever happening, or stop trying to be a force for good in the universe.
"And," he adds, "if you need me, or anyone else on the ship, there's ways to get in touch. If you want help, or just someone to talk to."
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She looks to him, her eyes large and unsure.
"Right?"
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"Right," Ford says. "And for every mistake, there's going to be a time when you get it right. You're a really remarkable person, Rose, and I'm glad I have the chance to know you."
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"Me too! I mean - I'm glad I had the chance to know you too, Ford - "
She leans over and engulfs him in a big, gentle Gem hug.
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"But no more secrets, okay?" he tells her, playful rather than condemning. "Take it from me - it's much easier to make mistakes when you don't seek out good advice. Or listen to it when it's given to you."
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"I see that now," she says quietly. "I mean, not just see it any more. I understand it. No more secrets."
She's too busy hugging to notice the appearance of a plate of cookies with pink frosting.
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He pulls back from the hug enough to look.
"That's funny. I'm sure those weren't there before."
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"I'm sure I would have noticed," Rose agrees, brows furrowing. "Is...is there a kind of flood that gives people cookies?"
That'd be...unusually benign.
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"Hm. They seem normal," he says, looking at the readout dubiously. "Of course, there's always the other possibility. They could be from the Admiral."
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"Hmm."
Rose reaches out, picking up a cookie with what should be normal strength in her inmate-limited state - and it shatters into crumbs between her fingertips.
"Oh!"
She looks over at Ford.
"....I think I have my powers back."
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"Really? Well, what are you waiting for?" he asks with excitement. "Try something out!"
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"Okay, let's see -"
She gets to her feet, making some distance between herself and Ford, then summons her sword - a huge, opalescent pink blade with a rose-patterned hilt.
Surprise makes her smile.
"Look!"
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He's beaming. As arbitrary, frustrating, and made-to-entertain as graduation is, the fact that Rose is alive and free again is something to be happy about.
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"I don't..."
But then she does. The celebratory snacks out of nowhere, the abilities she couldn't access? It all adds up, and she whoops a laugh and picks him up into a much bigger hug like he weighs nothing.
"Ford!"
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"You did it!" he cries. "You really did it! Rose, you get to go home! You're free!"
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Rose remembers herself and sets him down, gently, still laughing.
"And you get your deal, Ford! This is wonderful."
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Ford brushes off his sweater, a twinge of doubt nagging at his mind.
He wants his deal -- wants to see if the Admiral will give him the ability he wants, to get his family out of Gravity Falls and into a temporally open dimension. But...
It doesn't sit quite right with him to take the deal and walk away, as though all of this had just been a transaction. Ford hadn't really thought he could get anyone to graduation. It wasn't why he'd stayed. He'd meant to be a friend to Rose, not a moral guide, and she was the one who had done the work. Maybe he could find a way to get what he needed anyway, with enough time and science.
He wouldn't be able to sit peacefully with himself, as someone concerned about inmates' wellbeing, if he didn't ask her.
"Actually, about that," Ford says, his face turning serious. "I wanted to ask you -- do you want to take the deal? It doesn't feel right for me to take it, not without seeing if there was anything you needed first. You're the one whose life was in danger, who had to grow and change. I was...all I did was be your friend."
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