[Oh, buddy. Ford doesn't move to interrupt, or distract, but yeah -- yeah, he only managed to lie to Bill when it was the kids at stake, when he'd been scared of losing something. It isn't that Ford has a death wish, far from it! But he had accepted ages ago that if losing his life was the price he had to pay to defeat Bill, he would give it gladly.
He didn't feel the same about the kids'.
He listens, and his brows crease sympathetically as Bill admits that everyone else had had him fooled by pretending to be happy in second-dimension society. That'd be a humbling thing for anyone to realize. Those poor organisms, all of them -- what a terrible place to be.
He listens to the rest of it, about how Bill changed his name, went to school, thought he could think his way out of anything -- and about how Bill made himself a socially fearless pain in the ass. He cracks up when Bill tells him he mouthed off to more-sided citizens -- telling a hexagon to fuck himself is something he can absolutely see.]
I'm sure you did!
[ford pines is here for petty vengeance. impressed? also possibly.]
[BIG SMIRK yes he is the best at causing problems.]
IT MEANT HAD TO PROVE MY LOYALTY, A COUPLE TIMES. BUT I WAS GOOD AT THAT! EVERYBODY AROUND ME WAS JUST A DRONE, I HAD NO PROBLEM SAYING ANYTHING I NEEDED TO SAY TO THEM. OR DOING ANYTHING I NEEDED TO DO!
[Does he have mixed feelings about it, now? Kind of. Any of those people could have been in the rebellion and he made their work that much harder.]
I WAS PATIENT ENOUGH TO PLAY A LONG GAME. WELL, I GUESS YOU ALREADY KNOW.
[because of that long con he ran on ford for multiple years whoops]
EVENTUALLY, I GOT AN IN BY SUBMITTING EXAM SCORES TO PLACES THAT I KNEW I WOULDN'T GET INTO, TO PROVE I AT LEAST HAD A RESOURCE THAT COULD SERVE THE PURPOSES OF PROPER SOCIETY! I GOT NOBILITY TO HIRE ME ONTO PROJECTS THAT NEEDED MENIAL WORK IN EXCHANGE FOR NO CREDIT ON THE DISCOVERIES THEY MADE. THAT WAS FINE!
[The best at causing problems, it is a dubious title but Ford cares about him very much.
...but he sure does know how capable Bill is of long games, and how willing Bill is to throw other people under the bus. Cool to see Bill doubting that, though. Ford doesn't comment, just notes it.
Except that when Ford gets to the bit about working for no credit.]
That is not fine!
[What absolute scumbags. It's not enough what they did to the other classes, or the irregular shapes, but ooooh academic theft on top of that is too much!]
[Like constantly. Most science is just big teams of people doing lots of hours of tedious work, and then the most photogenic lab head gets in the news for all of it.]
MISTER HERO, HUH. YOU KNOW, YOU DOING ALL YOUR OWN FIELD WORK ACTUALLY ISN'T HOW IT'S USUALLY DONE.
[A little nudge under the chin this time. In another context Bill might have gotten frustrated with how much value Ford puts on Being Liked, but right now they just got back together and he's all full of fuzzy feelings.]
[but if you don't do your own field work, then how can you shut yourself up alone in a cabin for years with minimal human contact? how can you trust no one else will steal your discovery of the paranormal and go public before you can?? the only way to be safe is to go it alone!!
He accepts the chin nudge, lets it help his indignation fade. Fuzzy feelings, back together, yes ♥ ]
...for access to research an equilateral triangle wouldn't normally have?
I'D HEARD ABOUT THE THIRD DIMENSION, ANYONE WHO STUCK THEIR EYE INTO COUNTERCULTURE HAD HEARD OF IT. IT WAS KIND OF A STORY TOLD BY A GUY WHO'D DIED IN A GOVERNMENT HOSPITAL FOR MENTAL PATIENTS - HORRIFYING PLACES, BY THE WAY, REAL JAIL IS BETTER! - SO THERE WASN'T A LOT THAT WAS RELIABLE! BUT WHEREVER I WAS GOING TO BE IN ORDER TO NOT FEEL AWFUL ALL THE TIME, IT WASN'T IN THIS DIMENSION. THE CIRCLES - THAT'S THE GOVERNMENT - HAD KNOWN ABOUT IT AS LONG AS EVERYONE ELSE HAD, EVEN IF THEY DENIED IT! BUT INSTEAD OF EXPLORING IT, THEY WANTED TO CLOSE US OFF AND KEEP IT IT FROM EVER CONTACTING US AGAIN. THEY WERE PRETTY CLOSE, TOO, WHEN I GOT ONBOARD.
[Shrug.]
SEEMS CONVENIENT THAT IT LINED UP LIKE THAT, BUT IT WASN'T! THERE WAS A THREE-DIMENSIONAL FIGURE THEY WERE IN CONTACT WITH, WHO SPECIALIZED IN WORKING WITH GOVERNMENTAL ENTITIES. YOU MIGHT KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING!
SURE, I RECOGNIZED HIM AT SOME POINT. THE ONLY PERSON I TRUSTED BACK THEN WAS ME, SO I MADE SURE I CAUGHT HIS EYE. THEN WE WERE ABLE TO WORK FROM BOTH ENDS OF THE DIMENSIONAL BARRIER! THEY MADE A LOT OF PROGRESS WITH ME. WITH US! I WAS WHERE I NEEDED TO BE, BECAUSE I'D ARRIVED IN TIME FOR MYSELF.
[Bill thinks, taps his foot.]
...LOOK, TIME TRAVEL IS FUN, BUT IT'S HARD TO WORK INTO A STORY.
THE FUTURE VERSION OF ME TOLD ME THAT WE WERE GOING TO MAKE A DEAL. THAT SOUNDED FUN - I LIKED THE IDEA OF BOTH OF US NOT BOTHERING TO PRETEND WE WEREN'T SELF-INTERESTED. EVERYTHING ABOVE THE TABLE! HE SAID HE'D GET ME OUT, AND THAT WAS EVEN BETTER. I DIDN'T KNOW WHERE WE WERE GOING, BUT, SURE, JUST ABOUT ANYTHING'S BETTER THAN THE SECOND DIMENSION. I ALSO DIDN'T KNOW THAT WHEN TWO DIMENSIONAL COUNTERPARTS TOUCH, THE PARADOX COLLAPSES THE WHOLE THING.
[Bill turns a shaking-hands-with-himself gesture into a flat clapping motion - boom.]
SURE! SINCE I MADE THE DEAL HAPPEN FROM BOTH ENDS, I COULD EXPLAIN THE MECHANICS TO YOU, BUT A WHOLE UNIVERSE CEASING TO EXIST AT THE SAME TIME DOESN'T ACTUALLY GO NOWHERE. 'CEASE TO EXIST' IS KIND OF AN OVERSIMPLIFICATION. ALL THE MATTER COMES APART, BUT DOESN'T GET DESTROYED. A SUFFICIENTLY POWERFUL ENTITY CAN CONVERT IT STRAIGHT TO ENERGY!
THAT HURT A LOT, BUT THAT'S HOW I ENDED UP LIKE THIS!
...
THE NEXT TRILLION YEARS ARE LESS IMPORTANT! A LOT OF BEING ALONE IN BETWEEN UNIVERSES.
Mixed feelings about destroying universes is more moral consideration than I ever expected to hear from you, you know.
[This is great tbh. Ford could have lived with evil cackling mania as long as the maniac listened to him. He's used to having very very very low standards, and "I have mixed feelings about omnicide" is blowing them out of the water.]
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He didn't feel the same about the kids'.
He listens, and his brows crease sympathetically as Bill admits that everyone else had had him fooled by pretending to be happy in second-dimension society. That'd be a humbling thing for anyone to realize. Those poor organisms, all of them -- what a terrible place to be.
He listens to the rest of it, about how Bill changed his name, went to school, thought he could think his way out of anything -- and about how Bill made himself a socially fearless pain in the ass. He cracks up when Bill tells him he mouthed off to more-sided citizens -- telling a hexagon to fuck himself is something he can absolutely see.]
I'm sure you did!
[ford pines is here for petty vengeance. impressed? also possibly.]
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IT MEANT HAD TO PROVE MY LOYALTY, A COUPLE TIMES. BUT I WAS GOOD AT THAT! EVERYBODY AROUND ME WAS JUST A DRONE, I HAD NO PROBLEM SAYING ANYTHING I NEEDED TO SAY TO THEM. OR DOING ANYTHING I NEEDED TO DO!
[Does he have mixed feelings about it, now? Kind of. Any of those people could have been in the rebellion and he made their work that much harder.]
I WAS PATIENT ENOUGH TO PLAY A LONG GAME. WELL, I GUESS YOU ALREADY KNOW.
[because of that long con he ran on ford for multiple years whoops]
EVENTUALLY, I GOT AN IN BY SUBMITTING EXAM SCORES TO PLACES THAT I KNEW I WOULDN'T GET INTO, TO PROVE I AT LEAST HAD A RESOURCE THAT COULD SERVE THE PURPOSES OF PROPER SOCIETY! I GOT NOBILITY TO HIRE ME ONTO PROJECTS THAT NEEDED MENIAL WORK IN EXCHANGE FOR NO CREDIT ON THE DISCOVERIES THEY MADE. THAT WAS FINE!
[its just kind of the way shit works.]
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...but he sure does know how capable Bill is of long games, and how willing Bill is to throw other people under the bus. Cool to see Bill doubting that, though. Ford doesn't comment, just notes it.
Except that when Ford gets to the bit about working for no credit.]
That is not fine!
[What absolute scumbags. It's not enough what they did to the other classes, or the irregular shapes, but ooooh academic theft on top of that is too much!]
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[Like constantly. Most science is just big teams of people doing lots of hours of tedious work, and then the most photogenic lab head gets in the news for all of it.]
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[A little nudge under the chin this time. In another context Bill might have gotten frustrated with how much value Ford puts on Being Liked, but right now they just got back together and he's all full of fuzzy feelings.]
I KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING. I WAS USING THEM, TOO.
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He accepts the chin nudge, lets it help his indignation fade. Fuzzy feelings, back together, yes ♥ ]
...for access to research an equilateral triangle wouldn't normally have?
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I'D HEARD ABOUT THE THIRD DIMENSION, ANYONE WHO STUCK THEIR EYE INTO COUNTERCULTURE HAD HEARD OF IT. IT WAS KIND OF A STORY TOLD BY A GUY WHO'D DIED IN A GOVERNMENT HOSPITAL FOR MENTAL PATIENTS - HORRIFYING PLACES, BY THE WAY, REAL JAIL IS BETTER! - SO THERE WASN'T A LOT THAT WAS RELIABLE! BUT WHEREVER I WAS GOING TO BE IN ORDER TO NOT FEEL AWFUL ALL THE TIME, IT WASN'T IN THIS DIMENSION. THE CIRCLES - THAT'S THE GOVERNMENT - HAD KNOWN ABOUT IT AS LONG AS EVERYONE ELSE HAD, EVEN IF THEY DENIED IT! BUT INSTEAD OF EXPLORING IT, THEY WANTED TO CLOSE US OFF AND KEEP IT IT FROM EVER CONTACTING US AGAIN. THEY WERE PRETTY CLOSE, TOO, WHEN I GOT ONBOARD.
[Shrug.]
SEEMS CONVENIENT THAT IT LINED UP LIKE THAT, BUT IT WASN'T! THERE WAS A THREE-DIMENSIONAL FIGURE THEY WERE IN CONTACT WITH, WHO SPECIALIZED IN WORKING WITH GOVERNMENTAL ENTITIES. YOU MIGHT KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING!
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It was you! You went back in time, made contact with your old dimension, and helped your past self destroy it?
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I CAN NORMALLY MOVE FREELY BETWEEN THE PAST AND FUTURE. I DON'T DO IT A LOT, BECAUSE TIME BABY GETS IN THE WAY -
[Fucking hate that guy]
BUT I WANTED TO MAKE SURE I GOT CREATED. IF YOU WANT SOMETHING DONE RIGHT...
[You do it yourself!
He illustrates this with almost tying his arms in knots showing the paths of the timeline crossing over itself.]
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Did you realize you were you?
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[Bill thinks, taps his foot.]
...LOOK, TIME TRAVEL IS FUN, BUT IT'S HARD TO WORK INTO A STORY.
THE FUTURE VERSION OF ME TOLD ME THAT WE WERE GOING TO MAKE A DEAL. THAT SOUNDED FUN - I LIKED THE IDEA OF BOTH OF US NOT BOTHERING TO PRETEND WE WEREN'T SELF-INTERESTED. EVERYTHING ABOVE THE TABLE! HE SAID HE'D GET ME OUT, AND THAT WAS EVEN BETTER. I DIDN'T KNOW WHERE WE WERE GOING, BUT, SURE, JUST ABOUT ANYTHING'S BETTER THAN THE SECOND DIMENSION. I ALSO DIDN'T KNOW THAT WHEN TWO DIMENSIONAL COUNTERPARTS TOUCH, THE PARADOX COLLAPSES THE WHOLE THING.
[Bill turns a shaking-hands-with-himself gesture into a flat clapping motion - boom.]
WE MANAGED IT, THOUGH. WASN'T EVERYBODY SURPRISED! HEH, HAHAH, HAHAHAAHAH -
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...I should've guessed. That is the simplest way to destabilize a universe.
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THAT HURT A LOT, BUT THAT'S HOW I ENDED UP LIKE THIS!
...
THE NEXT TRILLION YEARS ARE LESS IMPORTANT! A LOT OF BEING ALONE IN BETWEEN UNIVERSES.
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[Holy shit. An entire dimension, turned into energy, and used to turn Bill into what he is.
He doesn't need the mechanics, he pretty much gets the idea.
Whoa.]
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[Bill looks subdued. He sort of did. And the way he is now is a constant reminder of that.]
I'M TRYING TO PUT IT BACK. QUENTIN'S HELPING ME SEE IF IT'S POSSIBLE.
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And for the next trillion years, you were alone?
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So, you would tear your way into a reality and remove its physical laws, causing it to collapse, then move on to the next one?
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I HAVE REALLY MIXED FEELINGS ABOUT THIS STUFF NOW.
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[This is great tbh. Ford could have lived with evil cackling mania as long as the maniac listened to him. He's used to having very very very low standards, and "I have mixed feelings about omnicide" is blowing them out of the water.]
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AHAHAHAHHAHA, YEAH, I KNOW.
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...what's wrong?
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What I mean is, I'm glad. To know the whole story. And that you're...going to try to be better.
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