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[He shuts his eyes, and feels very light.
It's strange, not having the burden of fighting Bill, or stopping him, or watching for an escape, or devising an alternative hanging over him. He's carried that weight for half his life. And even though he's had a few weeks to get used to the idea, to let go of Bill being his responsibility, he's still felt Bill's absence, even though other people crowded into his life, keeping him from being really alone. It wasn't the same. It wasn't him.
Having Bill back, being wanted, it's -- it is just as exciting when it's just a guy as it was when it was an unstoppable force of chaos and madness. It still makes him feel significant. He breaks into a laugh again, one with just a hint of hysteria.]
I want you back. It isn't the same without you. It's just a bunch of safe side projects and conflicting data and dealing with other demons smelling up my living room.
I'm not dreaming, am I? There's not a flood due yet, but the last breach threw all my timers out of whack. Tell me this is actually happening. That it won't be gone in a week.
It's strange, not having the burden of fighting Bill, or stopping him, or watching for an escape, or devising an alternative hanging over him. He's carried that weight for half his life. And even though he's had a few weeks to get used to the idea, to let go of Bill being his responsibility, he's still felt Bill's absence, even though other people crowded into his life, keeping him from being really alone. It wasn't the same. It wasn't him.
Having Bill back, being wanted, it's -- it is just as exciting when it's just a guy as it was when it was an unstoppable force of chaos and madness. It still makes him feel significant. He breaks into a laugh again, one with just a hint of hysteria.]
I want you back. It isn't the same without you. It's just a bunch of safe side projects and conflicting data and dealing with other demons smelling up my living room.
I'm not dreaming, am I? There's not a flood due yet, but the last breach threw all my timers out of whack. Tell me this is actually happening. That it won't be gone in a week.
[He leans his head forward, metal plate against Bill's surface above the eye.]
Then I'm going to trust it.
Then I'm going to trust it.
[Absolutely yes kiss time. There's the short one Bill starts, and then there's the second one Ford starts, which involves pushing Bill a few inches backward in the air out of enthusiasm. Ford can kiss better than this when he's thinking about it but right now he's not going for cinematic 80s movie kiss, it's more like being pounced on: genuine, full of uncontrolled affection, and maybe a little overwhelming. It's maybe two or three times the length of the first. Missed you!]
[The frankly Mabel-like energy carries through the kiss; it breaks and he looks up at Bill, and he's grinning.
This isn't going to be perfect. They'll still hit snags, and they'll definitely argue, and they should probably do something about how Bill feels like he's lost and also isn't sure what else he wants out of life, and the Barge will hit them with curveballs regardless, but they'll figure it out. They have way better odds of figuring it out now than they did three months ago.]
We've got some catching up to do.
This isn't going to be perfect. They'll still hit snags, and they'll definitely argue, and they should probably do something about how Bill feels like he's lost and also isn't sure what else he wants out of life, and the Barge will hit them with curveballs regardless, but they'll figure it out. They have way better odds of figuring it out now than they did three months ago.]
We've got some catching up to do.
Mm! Aha ha ha, I--I meant what we've been up to, Bill!
[Ford's tone, posture, and general manner all express delight, though. He makes no effort to extract himself from this very friendly set of alien hands he's found himself in the middle of. You scallywag.
(Also he's been sadness-exercising very consistently for like over two months, please notice.)]
[Ford's tone, posture, and general manner all express delight, though. He makes no effort to extract himself from this very friendly set of alien hands he's found himself in the middle of. You scallywag.
(Also he's been sadness-exercising very consistently for like over two months, please notice.)]
[He can't help a brief, contented sigh, though. It's not much more than a breath, but he has missed Bill enough, and trusts Bill to read any tension in his muscles enough, that being cuddled outside of clear romantic activities doesn't bother him the way it otherwise might. The trust levels are high, and so is the oxytocin.]
I'm making progress on the ship, and on Misty Day's pet-owner entanglement project. Besides that, I've kept an eye on the watches, and I've got some rather frustrating data on floods and breaches.
[He wiggles a hand so it is in Bill's, and he winds his other arm so Bill's is wrapped around it. Just gonna get comfy here, don't mind him.]
I'll probably compile a report after the next time we make port. There haven't been any involuntary disappearances so far, which is good for the passengers, but...it does mean research is at a standstill.
I'm making progress on the ship, and on Misty Day's pet-owner entanglement project. Besides that, I've kept an eye on the watches, and I've got some rather frustrating data on floods and breaches.
[He wiggles a hand so it is in Bill's, and he winds his other arm so Bill's is wrapped around it. Just gonna get comfy here, don't mind him.]
I'll probably compile a report after the next time we make port. There haven't been any involuntary disappearances so far, which is good for the passengers, but...it does mean research is at a standstill.
PET ENTANGLEMENT? ARE WE MAKING HUMAN-ANIMALS AGAIN?
[Bill squeezes Ford's hand and pecks him on the cheek. Yessss, a good cuddle. Bill has no cuddle discomfort. Bill will be parked on Ford any time any day for any reason.]
[Bill squeezes Ford's hand and pecks him on the cheek. Yessss, a good cuddle. Bill has no cuddle discomfort. Bill will be parked on Ford any time any day for any reason.]
Edited 2019-12-05 22:51 (UTC)
[kiss: accepted. gosh.]
Oh, goodness no.
[Yikeseydaisy, that was a bad time for a lot of folks. Ford got off relatively easy, but it messed a lot of people up.]
It's meant to quantum-entangle Barge pets with their owners. That way, if someone goes back home unexpectedly, we aren't stuck with a bunch of animals running around the ship.
Oh, goodness no.
[Yikeseydaisy, that was a bad time for a lot of folks. Ford got off relatively easy, but it messed a lot of people up.]
It's meant to quantum-entangle Barge pets with their owners. That way, if someone goes back home unexpectedly, we aren't stuck with a bunch of animals running around the ship.
[Ford sighs.]
The data I got was...strange. There appears to be a greater connection between floods and breaches than I initially suspected. Two phenomena take place during both events: an alteration of the person who is already here, and a sort of quantum-double possession.
During a flood, sometimes, a person just has their appearance and memory altered, leading them to behave differently than they otherwise might. Other times, they have a parallel version of themselves in the dimension that's flooding the Barge, and for a week, that version takes them over.
And breaches work the same way. Some of us possess parallel versions of ourselves that were already there. Others don't have an in-universe counterpart, and some effect of the Barge makes reality shift around them to make room, leaving them with altered appearances and memories.
The data I got was...strange. There appears to be a greater connection between floods and breaches than I initially suspected. Two phenomena take place during both events: an alteration of the person who is already here, and a sort of quantum-double possession.
During a flood, sometimes, a person just has their appearance and memory altered, leading them to behave differently than they otherwise might. Other times, they have a parallel version of themselves in the dimension that's flooding the Barge, and for a week, that version takes them over.
And breaches work the same way. Some of us possess parallel versions of ourselves that were already there. Others don't have an in-universe counterpart, and some effect of the Barge makes reality shift around them to make room, leaving them with altered appearances and memories.
Mhmm.
[Man, talking about this is so much less frustrating and easier to accept when he's got all these neurotransmitters lowering his cortisol levels.]
Same goes for flood-Barges. Like that time we became people from the same universe as our wardens, or became the opposite gender. It explains why some of our gender-changed selves knew one another already, even when they didn't come from the same original world.
[Man, talking about this is so much less frustrating and easier to accept when he's got all these neurotransmitters lowering his cortisol levels.]
Same goes for flood-Barges. Like that time we became people from the same universe as our wardens, or became the opposite gender. It explains why some of our gender-changed selves knew one another already, even when they didn't come from the same original world.
...she isn't.
[Ford sinks into a chair at the kitchen table, his voice heavy.]
I have the readings to prove it. She had shared memories with Guy-ris, but I have no idea how real he was.
[Real pushy, he would have noted, if this had been a journal. Ford thanks whatever is determining his history right now that he never used pet names with any of his female colleagues.]
It's possible that they were implanted into each other's memories, or that she was only in his for the week. Either way, this is the only version of her in existence.
[He extracts a hand to press it over his chest, where a waterproof pocket hidden in the lining contains the memories of Buford Caryn Pines.]
[Ford sinks into a chair at the kitchen table, his voice heavy.]
I have the readings to prove it. She had shared memories with Guy-ris, but I have no idea how real he was.
[Real pushy, he would have noted, if this had been a journal. Ford thanks whatever is determining his history right now that he never used pet names with any of his female colleagues.]
It's possible that they were implanted into each other's memories, or that she was only in his for the week. Either way, this is the only version of her in existence.
[He extracts a hand to press it over his chest, where a waterproof pocket hidden in the lining contains the memories of Buford Caryn Pines.]
I think so. I can only tell whether someone wearing a watch has a double or not, but if they do, then that alternate-Barge exists.
I have no idea.
[If there are infinite Barges, infinite Bargeyards, infinite Authorities...Ford imagines the spread of parallel universes unfolding like a fractal.]
The other Barges can affect our reality through floods. I suppose the most important question is, can our realities affect one another beyond that? Even if there are infinite Authorities, if they can't contact each other, then it doesn't matter.
I'm inclined to think there's only one Authority, and they're the ones responsible for pushing the different Barge realities together.
[If there are infinite Barges, infinite Bargeyards, infinite Authorities...Ford imagines the spread of parallel universes unfolding like a fractal.]
The other Barges can affect our reality through floods. I suppose the most important question is, can our realities affect one another beyond that? Even if there are infinite Authorities, if they can't contact each other, then it doesn't matter.
I'm inclined to think there's only one Authority, and they're the ones responsible for pushing the different Barge realities together.
[Ford thunks on that.]
It'd be hard to find evidence that's convincing, that couldn't be written off as a coincidence. Not without getting to the Authority.
[A weariness, on that last bit. Everything hinges on getting to the people in charge, but that's easier said than done, even when you work very very hard on it.]
It'd be hard to find evidence that's convincing, that couldn't be written off as a coincidence. Not without getting to the Authority.
[A weariness, on that last bit. Everything hinges on getting to the people in charge, but that's easier said than done, even when you work very very hard on it.]
Edited (spelling, stanley) 2019-12-06 01:40 (UTC)
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